Sunday, October 31, 2004

Advice for the Living on the Day of the Dead

Happy All Saint's Day. Drive carefully, and do stop by the graves of loved ones passed away. Now is a good time to forgive your abusive Dad or Evil Step-Mother and get on with the rest of your lives-- their ghosts need not haunt and hamstring you past today. I got a better idea. Why not stop by the graves of your loved ones immediately after today, so you won't get caught in the memorial rush next year?

And if you're rich and living aimless lives, try not to turn your grandaddy's mausoleum into a disco. It's. Not. Cool. Find your own venue for All Saint's Day debauchery. You can afford it.

Oh, And for My Friend R.--

If you do not get your shit together you will lose that girl. I repeat: You. Will. Lose. That girl. You've had that coming for the better part of a year. I'm only opening my trap about this now because she specifically told me not to speak of it a long time ago.

Pare, she loves you. But she understands if you will not commit-- she isn't waiting on you forever.

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